What I Hide Behind Closed Eyes

A girl in love with her famdoms (mostly The Newsroom, Supernatural, Teen Wolf, & The West Wing). Oh and I live for music. This blog is run by someone who is way too attached to fictional characters (mostly Dean Winchester, Josh Lyman, Sloan Sabbith, and Stiles Stilinski). This blog is also very heavily grounded in OTPs. (Icon made by loveletterbox).

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Catching Elephant is a theme by Andy Taylor

 

Today was the last day of my TV meme

Tomorrow I will start a meme on shipping. I know some of you will remember the last time I did that but I’ve gained a few followers since then. Also this one asks different questions so you’ll learn new things.

I want to be a comfort to my friends in tragedy and I want to be able to celebrate with them in triumph. And for all the times in between, I just want to be able to look them in the eye.

The Top 5 TV Meme

5 Favorite Quotes

1) Josh Lyman-The Crackpots and These Women (The West Wing)

This was the moment that Josh officially become my favorite. The fact that it was so very important for him to stay with his friends was a comfort to me. It was nice to the Josh’s softer side if you will.

My name is Dean Winchester. I’m an Aquarius, I enjoy sunsets, long walks on the beach and frisky women. And I did not kill anyone.

The Top 5 TV Meme

5 Favorite Quotes

2) Dean Winchester-The Usual Suspects (Supernatural)

I think this quote pretty covers Dean’s approach to life. A dash of devil may care, mixed with humor, but in the end serious when it matters.

What’s the matter? You don’t think you deserve to be saved?

The Top 5 TV Meme

5 Favorite Quotes

3) Castiel-Lazarus Rising (Supernatural)

The reason I like this quote is as much about what is being said and how it’s being said. Misha plays this line with an attention detail that it quite literately kills me. He squints and his eye brows curl together before he says the line give the appearance that Castiel can’t understand how this human doesn’t see his own worth. Even when he delivers you can still feel the disbelief. This moment marks the moment that I feel in love with both Castiel and Misha.

Dan: You know, sometimes it’s worth it, taking all the pies in the face. Sometimes you come though it feelin’ good.
Casey: Yes.
Dan: And how was your day?
Casey: Sometimes you just stand there, hip-deep in pie.

The Top 5 TV Meme

5 Favorite Quotes

4) Dana and the Deep Blue Sea (Sports Night)

This is one of the best analogies for life that I have ever come across, and I hope at the end of the day you all come though feeling good.

Sheldon: Look, if you fail at this relationship, and history suggests that you will, we risk losing the Medical Officer that our landing party has always needed.
Leonard: What landing party?
Sheldon: See, you’re Kirk, I’m Spock, Wolowitz is Scotty, Koothrappali is the guy who always gets killed, and now we’ve got McCoy. – The White Asparagus Triangulation

The Top 5 TV Meme

5 Favorite Quotes

5) The White Asparagus Triangulation-The Big Bang Theory

I think it says a lot about Sheldon’s character that he planed this all out. It’s sad Leonard blows it for him and looses McCoy.

The Top 5 TV Meme 5 Episodes that made you Cry 1) 3.16 No Rest for the Wicked (Supernatural) It should be obvious why this episode makes me cry. If you haven’t figured out that I’m a Dean girl by now there may not be any hope for you. Watching Dean be torn apart by hell hounds remains the hardest thing that Supernatural has ever made me watch. It physically hurt to watch Sam hold him and stare into Dean’s dead eyes, it nearly killed me to see Dean on the rack screaming for Sam and knowing Sam couldn’t save him. What really sucks about this episode is that no matter how many people I get into Supernatural none of them are as effected by this episode as I was. They say condescending things like “well you knew he was going to be ok.” Ok so fuck you no we didn’t we had no idea. When Dean got dragged into hell I knew only two ways to get him back. One, Sam makes a deal, and since he didn’t seem to have anything to demons wanted that was out. Also if Dean came back because Sam made a deal, he’d have been pissed. Door number two was Dean gets out of hell as a demon, and I’d didn’t even want to admit this door existed. So I had no idea it was going to be ok, everything was broken and it all hurt. The crazy thing is that I still cry when I see this episode, even though I now know it will be ok. I think this proves I’m too emotionally invested in Dean Winchester. 

The Top 5 TV Meme

5 Episodes that made you Cry

1) 3.16 No Rest for the Wicked (Supernatural)

It should be obvious why this episode makes me cry. If you haven’t figured out that I’m a Dean girl by now there may not be any hope for you. Watching Dean be torn apart by hell hounds remains the hardest thing that Supernatural has ever made me watch. It physically hurt to watch Sam hold him and stare into Dean’s dead eyes, it nearly killed me to see Dean on the rack screaming for Sam and knowing Sam couldn’t save him.

What really sucks about this episode is that no matter how many people I get into Supernatural none of them are as effected by this episode as I was. They say condescending things like “well you knew he was going to be ok.” Ok so fuck you no we didn’t we had no idea. When Dean got dragged into hell I knew only two ways to get him back. One, Sam makes a deal, and since he didn’t seem to have anything to demons wanted that was out. Also if Dean came back because Sam made a deal, he’d have been pissed. Door number two was Dean gets out of hell as a demon, and I’d didn’t even want to admit this door existed. So I had no idea it was going to be ok, everything was broken and it all hurt.

The crazy thing is that I still cry when I see this episode, even though I now know it will be ok. I think this proves I’m too emotionally invested in Dean Winchester. 

The Top 5 TV Meme 5 episodes that made you cry 2) 2.01 In The Shadow of Two Gunmen. Part 1 (The West Wing) What always gets me about this is epoisde is the scene where they have to tell Donna what’s happened. I started getting misty the moment I saw her because my first thought was she doesn’t know. And then Toby tells her and at first it doesn’t sink in right away it just breaks my heart. So he has to tell her again and he face just falls. And mean while while CJ is explaining things Sam is just sitting there with his mouth in his hand like he can’t possibly deal with having to hear this all out loud again. But what kills me every time is the picture above when Donna covers he face with her hand. For me there was something about that moment that made this real, it’s like now that Donna knows it’s real and I just started bawling.

The Top 5 TV Meme

5 episodes that made you cry

2) 2.01 In The Shadow of Two Gunmen. Part 1 (The West Wing)

What always gets me about this is epoisde is the scene where they have to tell Donna what’s happened. I started getting misty the moment I saw her because my first thought was she doesn’t know. And then Toby tells her and at first it doesn’t sink in right away it just breaks my heart. So he has to tell her again and he face just falls. And mean while while CJ is explaining things Sam is just sitting there with his mouth in his hand like he can’t possibly deal with having to hear this all out loud again. But what kills me every time is the picture above when Donna covers he face with her hand. For me there was something about that moment that made this real, it’s like now that Donna knows it’s real and I just started bawling.

The Top 5 TV Meme 5 Episodes that made you Cry 3) 6.20 The Man Who Would Be King (Supernatural) For me this episode hurt more then Castiel’s actual death.  See when Castiel died I was so pissed off that crying wasn’t really a choice. This episode though this one gutted me like none other. I remember the exact moment that the train started to have trouble staying on the rails and when it finally flew wildly off it. And for the sake of my sanity I think those are the things that I focus on.  When I started to become mushy was when Castiel talks about the hardest part of this was Dean who was trying so hard to be faithful when everything was telling him otherwise. I’ve always loved their friendship, and I’ve always wondered how much Dean let it mean too him. Dean has this habit of keeping people at arms length and I always wondered if Dean really let Castiel in. In this moment I wondered why I ever doubted him. The fact that Dean doesn’t automatically assume that Castiel is screwing them over shows that Dean has come to trust and care for Castiel and it breaks my heart that he’s going to lose that. The second part of this episode that eats my heart for dinner is when they trap Castiel in holy fire. The fact that it even comes to this hurts a lot but what really started the water works for this episode is that you see Dean and Castiel’s first instinct is to protect each other. Castiel had wanted to keep Dean out of hunting if he could help it, he was going to let Dean drift away from him because he thought that was what Dean wanted. Dean on the other hand is trying to protect Castiel from the ugly things that people, like making deals with demons. So with a broken heart I guess that’s all for now. Even though I doubt that we ever will, I’ll keep my fingers crossed that we get this Castiel back some day.

The Top 5 TV Meme

5 Episodes that made you Cry

3) 6.20 The Man Who Would Be King (Supernatural)

For me this episode hurt more then Castiel’s actual death.  See when Castiel died I was so pissed off that crying wasn’t really a choice. This episode though this one gutted me like none other. I remember the exact moment that the train started to have trouble staying on the rails and when it finally flew wildly off it. And for the sake of my sanity I think those are the things that I focus on. 

When I started to become mushy was when Castiel talks about the hardest part of this was Dean who was trying so hard to be faithful when everything was telling him otherwise. I’ve always loved their friendship, and I’ve always wondered how much Dean let it mean too him. Dean has this habit of keeping people at arms length and I always wondered if Dean really let Castiel in. In this moment I wondered why I ever doubted him. The fact that Dean doesn’t automatically assume that Castiel is screwing them over shows that Dean has come to trust and care for Castiel and it breaks my heart that he’s going to lose that.

The second part of this episode that eats my heart for dinner is when they trap Castiel in holy fire. The fact that it even comes to this hurts a lot but what really started the water works for this episode is that you see Dean and Castiel’s first instinct is to protect each other. Castiel had wanted to keep Dean out of hunting if he could help it, he was going to let Dean drift away from him because he thought that was what Dean wanted. Dean on the other hand is trying to protect Castiel from the ugly things that people, like making deals with demons.

So with a broken heart I guess that’s all for now. Even though I doubt that we ever will, I’ll keep my fingers crossed that we get this Castiel back some day.

The Top 5 TV Meme 5 Episodes That Made You Cry 4) 7.10 Death’s Door (Supernatural) There have been episodes in Supernatural’s long sorted history that have made me cry, and there there are ones that leave me curled up in a ball sobbing even thought the eposide has been over for fifteen minutes. This would be the latter. For the first time since season one, I really felt Sam and Dean are really out there on their own that makes this so hopeless. Ok my feelings about Bobby’s, death mother of God this is going be so hard, I started talking about it last night with my mom and I almost started crying. From the moment Karen and Bobby had their fight I started cry and I cried for the rest of that episode and a good ten minutes after it was over. This summery isn’t going to be in any kind of order because I just sat down and made a list of all the things I could think of that I wanted to talk about so bare with me. Also unlike with episodes past I don’t have a way to watch it that won’t tie up our internet. First I want to talk about a line that really got to me, “I adopted two boys. And they grew up great. They grew up heroes.” The first thing that  actually started me crying is when Karen said he’d make a great dad and I was just sitting there tears rolling down my face going she’s right Bobby you were! I’ve always thought that Bobby was a much better father then John and it really breaks my heart to think that he might not have known that. “Because they are my boys.” – Wow, I just love Bobby so damn much! I really do, since he first showed up in season one I’ve loved this man and the way he always comes though for the boys and his first thought in always for them. Bobby provided them with a parent and they needed that. Also he played catch with Dean! I like that Bobby tried to give them some little shred of normal an afternoon in the park doing things all the other kids do. It also gave Dean an activity that didn’t revolve around taking care of Sam, as so much of the rest of his life has. The face that the episode ended with “Idjits,” was both perfect and soul crushing. I think when he said that part of me died. I just love him so much and I can’t even handle my life right now. I saw someone on tumblr say that: You can be Samgirl or a Dean girl, you can ship Wincest or Destiel or whatever and have shipping wars until the end of time. You can love Cas or hate Cas or wish the show stopped at Season 5. But fuck it. Every. Single. Person.  Loved Bobby. Every single one, and you’re lying to yourself if you didn’t He was their father. They were his idjits. The one thing we agreed on was Bobby. I think that says it better than I ever could, this episode was about losing a parent and finally having to face the fact that you are on your own, and I simply wasn’t ready to grow up.

The Top 5 TV Meme

5 Episodes That Made You Cry

4) 7.10 Death’s Door (Supernatural)

There have been episodes in Supernatural’s long sorted history that have made me cry, and there there are ones that leave me curled up in a ball sobbing even thought the eposide has been over for fifteen minutes. This would be the latter. For the first time since season one, I really felt Sam and Dean are really out there on their own that makes this so hopeless.

Ok my feelings about Bobby’s, death mother of God this is going be so hard, I started talking about it last night with my mom and I almost started crying. From the moment Karen and Bobby had their fight I started cry and I cried for the rest of that episode and a good ten minutes after it was over. This summery isn’t going to be in any kind of order because I just sat down and made a list of all the things I could think of that I wanted to talk about so bare with me. Also unlike with episodes past I don’t have a way to watch it that won’t tie up our internet.

First I want to talk about a line that really got to me, “I adopted two boys. And they grew up great. They grew up heroes.” The first thing that  actually started me crying is when Karen said he’d make a great dad and I was just sitting there tears rolling down my face going she’s right Bobby you were! I’ve always thought that Bobby was a much better father then John and it really breaks my heart to think that he might not have known that.

“Because they are my boys.” – Wow, I just love Bobby so damn much! I really do, since he first showed up in season one I’ve loved this man and the way he always comes though for the boys and his first thought in always for them. Bobby provided them with a parent and they needed that.

Also he played catch with Dean! I like that Bobby tried to give them some little shred of normal an afternoon in the park doing things all the other kids do. It also gave Dean an activity that didn’t revolve around taking care of Sam, as so much of the rest of his life has.

The face that the episode ended with “Idjits,” was both perfect and soul crushing. I think when he said that part of me died. I just love him so much and I can’t even handle my life right now.

I saw someone on tumblr say that: You can be Samgirl or a Dean girl, you can ship Wincest or Destiel or whatever and have shipping wars until the end of time. You can love Cas or hate Cas or wish the show stopped at Season 5. But fuck it. Every. Single. Person.  Loved Bobby. Every single one, and you’re lying to yourself if you didn’t He was their father. They were his idjits. The one thing we agreed on was Bobby.

I think that says it better than I ever could, this episode was about losing a parent and finally having to face the fact that you are on your own, and I simply wasn’t ready to grow up.